By April Kelsey  

The following sermon was given by Ms. April Kelsey at the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of the Peninsula in Newport News, Virginia, on February 16, 2020.  April opened her message with this clip [1:15-2:36] from "How to Live the Life You Never Imagined," by Richard Pimental.

​Back in October of 2007, I received a phone call from a private school in Millington, TN, asking if I would be interested in becoming their long-term substitute English teacher. They had just let their English teacher go and needed an immediate replacement. I had just graduated from college with a degree in English literature—and, like many people with English degrees, was sitting at home, unemployed, writing my first novel. Well, how could I say no to a paycheck? ​

But teaching there came as a bit of a shock. For instance, as a child, I had been taught to take pride in my surroundings. For example, you don’t let your guests come over to messy house. You don’t litter in green spaces…or any spaces. And if you see a mess that someone else has left behind, you do the noble thing and clean it up. I’m not sure if “taught” is the right word to express how I acquired this mindset; more like it was ground into me at a cellular level.

So imagine my surprise when, at the end of lunch, I asked one of my sixth graders to throw away a paper plate that he had been playing with, and he refused. “Why?” I asked. “The garbage can is right there, literally within arm’s reach. All you have to do is toss it in. It will take less than a second.” 

He replied, “It’s not my plate! Someone else brought it here.”

Of course, that ‘someone else’ had already left the table. And my student was fully prepared to let that plate clutter up the cafeteria rather than take any action to deal with it.

Now, this may seem like a minor anecdote, but I’ve actually heard similar statements from full-grown adults. Statements such as, “I’m not a woman, so why should I care about women’s rights?” Or “I’ve got a pretty good job. Why should I care about income inequality?” Or “I’ve never owned any slaves. Why should I care about racism?” 
​
Those particular messes—of sexism, racism, and inequality—are a lot bigger to clean up than a paper plate. The people who made them originally have long been dead. And the garbage can is hardly within reach. So what makes it our responsibility to do the work and clean them up?

​I would say, like old Sergeant Parker from the video, that it is our ability to respond. I believe when we phrase responsibility in this way—as something we can do rather than an obligation—it allows us to embrace the work with passion and even joy.

But, as always, we have to be careful. Because we live in a world of Facebook and Instagram, a lot of our social justice work can become performative rather than transformative. Here we are, with our coordinating t-shirts and clever protest signs posing for a photo. Here we are on Facebook with our “I voted” stickers. Here we are with a video of us feeding the hungry. Aren’t we just good, woke people making the world a better place?

I don’t know. Who did we march for? Do we know their names? Their faces? Their concerns? Did we make space for them to speak on their own behalf? Did we listen to what they had to say—even when it made us uncomfortable? Did we treat them as fellow members of the community, or simply as the beneficiaries of our good graces?

Before anyone gets too offended, I’ve been asking myself these same questions. What I’ve realized is that in order for social justice work to be transformative, I have to be transformed in the process, too. I have to let my life be touched—and my mind be changed—by the people I wish to serve. Performance is a one-way street. When someone performs, one person does the action while others stand aside and watch. The spectators applaud. We take a nice picture to capture the moment and feel good about ourselves. If we’re not careful, we can, in time, fall into a superficial moralism where we think we’re too good for criticism and don’t have to look at ourselves too closely in the mirror anymore.

Transformation is not like that. In the transformative, everyone is working together. Everyone is giving and receiving. Everyone is changed. In the transformative, social justice work is no longer about me and my reputation. It’s not about whether people think I’m feminist, woke, anti-racist or anti-poverty. In fact, people who passionately embrace transformative work are likely to be called all sorts of names. They’ll step on toes. They’ll make mistakes. They’ll make a whole lot of people on both sides of the aisle highly uncomfortable. Dr. King noted as much in his “Letter from Birmingham Jail.”

However, I think joy comes from engaging in this transformative work. Joy comes from the peace found in one’s inner security—the sense that I’m doing the right and honest thing—in spite of what my natural allies might think. I don’t have to fear loss or slander when I give freely out of my resources. I don’t have to give into anger when criticized, because the work ultimately isn’t about me.

Someone recently asked me, “Does it matter? If people are being helped, does it matter whether it’s performative or transformative?”

My answer was, I think it matters—because the performative exists to serve one’s ego, and egos like to be fed regularly. When you’re busy feeding your ego, you’re very likely to perpetuate the systems of oppression that create the need for social justice in the first place.

​In short, transformative social justice requires that we decenter ourselves. Or as the Bible puts it, “having no greater love than the one who lays down their life for their friends.”

My early years as an evangelical taught me how to do the first part really well. Everything that we did in worship and relationship was about how to love God in the best way possible. I came to Unitarian Universalism to get the second part of the teaching: to learn how to love others well. I don’t see Unitarian Universalism as a departure from my tradition, but rather as a natural continuation of it."

So like Dr. King, I’m perplexed when white evangelicals claim that social justice is not “a gospel issue.” The word “gospel” literally means “good news.” Many of my fellow Christians think the good news is that we’re being rescued from a hellacious afterlife cooked up by an angry God. But I’m not so sure. In the Gospel of Luke Chapter 4, Jesus visits his hometown and reads these words from the Book of Isaiah:

“The Spirit of the Lord is on me,
because he has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners
and recovery of sight for the blind,
to set the oppressed free,
to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”

What does this mean? Well, the year of the Lord’s favor refers to the Year of Jubilee, the seventh year in the Jewish calendar when all debts to the wealthy were erased. People who had been sold into slavery to provide income to their families were set free. To the poor, the recovery of their freedom and dignity was indeed great news. It meant a second chance at life. It meant that their suffering had an end. It disrupted systems of exploitation that would otherwise become permanent.

This is the news that Jesus said he had come to proclaim.

Jesus also said, in Matthew 18:18, that “whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.” In other words, our physical world mirrors our spiritual world. They are not separate spheres, but two parts that comprise a whole reality. What happens outwardly reflects what exists inwardly.

​Therefore, in my mind, it is impossible to reveal to others a saving grace that is content to leave people in literal chains. How can I demonstrate the spirit of a Christ who came to set prisoners free if I never lift my hand to free my neighbor?

Therefore, I’d argue that social justice IS, absolutely, a gospel issue. The Book of James Chapter 2 vs 15 says, “Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.”

The problem I see in America is that we have a lot of churches with a lot of dead faith. (No wonder it stinks around here.) We have a lot of people, on both sides of the political aisle, who will wave away issues like abuse, torture, racial discrimination and income inequality simply because addressing them is inconvenient to our current habits. The garbage can isn’t within easy reach. We might have to give up a little bit of space. We might have to listen instead of speak. We might have to examine our own prejudices. And that seems hard…and unfair. After all, we didn’t ask to be born into this culture at this time. We didn’t start by making the mess.
​
But…here we are. And here is the good news: we are not powerless. We have the ability to respond. We can create momentum. We can lay claim to a faith that flames up to banish the darkness and bring the light of hope. We can free our neighbors from oppression. We can achieve the beloved community that we desire—one that’s diverse and vibrant and always expanding. We just have to embrace the joy of our ability and start where we are.     

theme: Integrity

This year, we are taking our monthly themes from “Soul Matters”, a network of Unitarian Universalist congregations who follow the same themes for the purpose of sharing worship, music, religious education and small group resources.

Unless otherwise noted, services include sermons preached by the Rev. Andrew Clive Millard and take place at 9:30am and 11:15am on Sundays.

January 5th: “True to Ourselves”

Integrity comes from the Latin “integer” meaning “whole”.  It implies an inner wholeness and consistency of character, but integrity isn’t something we get by adding more; it’s already there, and we discover it by clearing away the extraneous.  At this time of New Year’s Resolutions, let’s talk about what this means for us as individuals and for us as a congregation.

January 12th: “Side with Love”

For the last ten years, the interfaith public advocacy campaign known as “Side with Love” has been promoting respect for the inherent worth and dignity of every person by confronting issues of exclusion, oppression and violence based on identity.  As we prepare to celebrate Thirty Days of Love, let’s consider some of the ways that we can side with love here in Virginia.

January 19th: “Choosing Justice”

Do you consider yourself an “activist”?  Every UU congregation has people who describe themselves using that term.  But all of us, including those of us who don’t identify as activists, make tough choices when it comes to living by our principles.  Our speakers will describe how they make tough choices when it comes to the social justice issues they support.

The Social Justice Committee serves to facilitate the important social actions that take place within the congregation, as well as to raise awareness of issues in the interest of securing human rights, an equitable distribution of resources, a healthy planet, democracy, and a space for the human spirit to thrive.  We are committed to active involvement with social issues following the UUA’s Seven Principles.

January 26th: “Embracing Unknowing”

There is a natural human impulse to understand the world around us, but just because we want to know everything doesn’t mean that we can.  What if there are some things we cannot understand, whether now or ever?  How do we learn to accept mystery, to truly be okay with the idea — beloved of so many Unitarian Universalists — that to question is the answer?

This sermon topic was won by Rebecca Wheeler in last Spring’s “Inspire the Sermon!” on-line auction.

​This is the first of many meetings both large and small that will take place to inform members about our recent and past strategic planning work. Since many of you joined UUFP in the past several years a little history lesson is in order to bring you up to date on our previous planning efforts.
​
We moved into our current location on Youngs Mill Lane (that was designed to accommodate 75-100 people) in 1980 with approximately 50 members. Newer members may not know that previous planning committees since 1995, have indicated the need for more space. The last time this building was expanded was nearly 30 years ago. In 1990 the Fellowship was expanded to enlarge the sanctuary and the Caum room was added for additional meeting space.

Five years later (1995) a Facility task force ranked its highest priorities as follows:

• Build a new building with sufficient land to expand the with parking
• Or, relocate to a larger, existing building
• Double our RE space and enlarge the sanctuary

 
In 2001 the Policy Board took steps to seek out a new church building or arrange for the purchase of an existing building.  There was a lack of RE space and no offices for staff. Fast forward to 2007 the board hired Frankie Price Stern a UUA capital campaign consultant.  We reviewed our history to that point and growth projections were made. The congregation was poised for growth but once again hampered by a lack of space.  We learned that a congregation of our size will typically not grow beyond our current size of 150-160--unless we increased our square footage.  We also learned that any plan to proceed must recognize three main areas which needed to balance as we grow in membership:

• Sanctuary size
• Religious Education facilities
• Social space.

We began to hold two services on Sunday to accommodate our growth and to create a welcoming, comfortable environment for visitors.

In 2013 the planning committee was revived with Mason Moseley as the chair.  A five year plan in 2015 once again indicated the need to renovate our current property or find an existing property on the peninsula.  When I became board president in 2015 I realized that we needed to update our former mission and vision to address the needs of the current congregation.  In February of 2017 leadership met with Kathy McGowan from the UUA southern region to discuss a process to:

1. Define our “Core values”  (what we feel in our hearts,)
2. Write a new mission statement (a call to action, a way to focus what we are about and who we want to be)
3. Create our vision, the reason for the fellowship to exist in the future and live out our mission.

So, in 2017 our congregation met to define our essential core values Wonder, Love, Service and Generosity.  We agreed in June 2018 that our mission was to “Grow in Wonder, Connect in Love, Engage in service and Inspire Generosity.”  Since that time we have been living out our mission and have begun to prepare for the next steps by working on a new five year plan or process for our future.

On July 13 of this year, about a third of our congregation met for a workshop to create a new vision of what UUFP would look like in five years.  Many ideas and wishes were expressed about what the congregation will do in the future and Andrew summarized all of our ideas (in order of the most universally supported) as follows:

1. We will have larger, flexible, inspirational spaces. (250+ capacity, more space for music, and more classrooms
2. We will have green space
3. We will have universal site design which is environmentally friendly and accessible.
4. We will have a more diverse congregation
5. We will practice social justice.
6. We will be more visible.
7. We will have plans and funds for development, more support staff and spiritual development groups.

 
Everyone present on July 13th was asked to write down what they liked best about UUFP.  By a large majority, “community” was the answer.  Reverend Andrew has suggested that perhaps “our purpose is Community, practicing it as deeply and thoroughly as we can within or beyond our walls."  Also, this year, the Planning Committee has been gathering five year goals from our committees and collated that data to see how it aligns with our vision.

Yes we have been busy!!  And I am grateful for all who have contributed their time to these efforts over the years. This work will bring us to understand our shared vision for the Fellowship’s future and we will begin to define a process to get there.

So after nearly 30 year, it is time for us to make a decision.  As many of you know, the policy board will be asking the congregation to make a decision in March.  Can our vision can be realized in our current location or in a new location?

Change is inevitable, invigorating and challenging.  I get excited when I envision us all worshiping together in one service and creating spaces for middle school and high school age kids to call their own.  I have no doubt that if we are guided by our vision of who we want to be in this community both inside and outside of our walls we will make the best decision for those of us already here and for those families who have yet to discover what we have to share.

In closing I would like to share the words of our former interim minister Rev. Don Vaughn Forrester from 2008:  “I would hope that whatever this congregation eventually does will strengthen the use of reason, ethical responsibility and religious development within itself and promote such virtues in the larger community. Whatever you pursue, I hope UUFP will grow to be even more an oasis of reason and acceptance….than it already is."

theme: Awe

This year, we are taking our monthly themes from “Soul Matters”, a network of Unitarian Universalist congregations who follow the same themes for the purpose of sharing worship, music, religious education and small group resources.

Unless otherwise noted, services include sermons preached by the Rev. Andrew Clive Millard and take place at 9:30am and 11:15am on Sundays.

December 1st: “What Are We Waiting For?”

Advent is a time of waiting in preparation for Christmas.  We may mark that time by lighting the candles on an Advent wreath and by opening the doors on an Advent calendar.  Is that all there is when it comes to waiting, though?  What might we do to prepare ourselves for what is to come?

December 8th: “‘Tis the Season”

The best of Christmas invites us to celebrate the best of our humanity.  From faith, hope and love to peace, joy and generosity, the values lifted up by the holidays call us to live into our better selves, and not just for a few weeks but for the whole year.  Let’s reflect on how we can do that together.

December 15th: “Night Magic”

When do you feel the presence of the Divine or your communion with your own soul?  Many things can cause us to sense our spiritual self more acutely then we normally do.  Jim Sanderson will explore through readings and a homily how the Night can awaken him to the wonder of all.

UUFP President Jim Sanderson is a long-time Unitarian Universalist.  He has served as chair of the Sunday Services Committee, as Vice President, and as a Fellowship Circle facilitator.  Before joining the Fellowship, Jim was the minister of the Jenkins UU Fellowship in Petersburg and served as chair of the Religious Education Committee at First UU in Richmond.

Special Service!
7pm on Tuesday December 17th: “Blue Holidays”

Sometimes the holidays are hard, but we often put pressure on ourselves to “be jolly”, at least around others.  It might be helpful to acknowledge our complex feelings about the holidays.  Come light a candle, share a memory, support a friend.  Bring a meaningful ornament, the photo of a loved one, a token of hope for the future, or simply the gift of your presence.

Childcare will be available, and tea and cookies will be offered after the service.

December 22nd: “Measure in Love”

How do you love?  Does love hold you, fill you, fling you into the world?  Whom do you love?  Are there family members or friends, close to you or far away, living or departed, their faces in your heart?  Does your love reach out, to heal, to comfort, to feed the hungry and warm the cold?

Special music will be provided by the fabulous ChorUUs!

Christmas Eve Services!
5pm on Tuesday December 24th: “The Story of Christmas”
7pm on Tuesday December 24th: “Wise Women Know Better”

We hold two services on Christmas Eve!  The earlier is a family service using puppets to tell the story of the birth of Jesus, reflecting on the joy and hope this story can bring to our lives; the later tells a modern story of the magi and how they might have needed some help to make their journey.  Each service features traditional Christmas carols and concludes with the beloved ceremony of passing the flame.

At both services, special music for Christmas will be provided by the UUFP Winds!

December 29th: “Of Time and Family”

As we look ahead to new year, let’s pause to reflect on the joys and sorrows of the year that is now coming to a close.  We’ll remember those in our community who died, whose absences we feel in our hearts, and we’ll celebrate the new lives amongst us with the ceremony of child dedication.

​We have an exciting opportunity to hear from our sister congregations in Williamsburg and Virginia Beach about how they addressed their space needs by either expanding their existing facilities or moving to a larger location.
 
Members of the Williamsburg Unitarian Universalists and the Coastal Virginia Unitarian Universalists have kindly agreed to tell us about their experiences.  On Saturday, November 16, 2019, presentations will begin in the UUFP Sancturary at 10:30 a.m., and the discussion will continue over a light lunch.
 
Let us know that you plan to attend, as well as letting us know of any dietary preferences or restrictions, by contacting Marcy Stutzman (secretary@uufp.org) or any member of the Policy Board or the Planning Committee, or click on the following link:  Sign up Now.

theme: Attention

This year, we are taking our monthly themes from “Soul Matters”, a network of Unitarian Universalist congregations who follow the same themes for the purpose of sharing worship, music, religious education and small group resources.

Unless otherwise noted, services include sermons preached by the Rev. Andrew Clive Millard and take place at 9:30am and 11:15am on Sundays.

November 3rd: “Beyond the Pond”

Small Fry and the other fish only knew what life was like in their pond, all of them swimming together around and around.  Frog would tell her about a whole world beyond the pond, but Small Fry had a hard time believing any of Frog’s stories until the day that Eagle took her to see that world with her own eyes.  How would Small Fry explain it to the other fish, though?

November 10th: “Saints by Calling”

Our faith is built on the importance of relationships — with one another, with our world, with the stranger, with ourselves, and with all that we consider holy — and our centuries-old tradition is centered on the relationships both between members and between congregations.  What can we learn from our sister congregations in Williamsburg and Virginia Beach as we move forward?

November 17th: “Does the Earth Have a Soul? The Ecological Crisis Is a Spiritual Crisis”

Technology and modern life have interrupted our emotional, spiritual and mythic relationship with Nature.  We will explore the damage such a breach has caused to the human soul.  I believe we must seek a spiritual response to the ecological crisis if “we are to help bring the world as a living whole back into balance.” (Spiritual Ecology: The Cry of the Earth)

Dr. Susan Moseley is contract Minister for the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of the Rappahannock in White Stone.  She received her Doctorate of Educational Ministries from Columbia Theological Seminary in 2012 and her certificate in Spiritual Direction from the Haden Institute in 2017.

With our Share-the-Basket partner Virginia Interfaith Power & Light, we are participating in Climate in the Pulpit 2019.

November 24th: “Joyful Thanksgiving”

Gratitude is good for you!  As we look forward to this year’s national holiday of giving thanks, let’s consider how a practice of gratitude can make a difference.  For what are you grateful in your own life?  What would it mean to give thanks not only for the joys but also for the challenges?  How can we embody gratitude, not only individually but also collectively as a congregation?

Special music will be provided by the fabulous ChorUUs!

Written inside the wonderful graphic footprints on the back wall of the sanctuary you can read the commitments many of us made several months ago as our first step toward this process.  You can also see that these small step commitments have begun marching us forward to the place where some of the five year goals for our building and Fellowship are displayed.  The Planning Committee has also solicited five year goals from each of our committees and the Board.  We are in the process of organizing these ideas into an actionable list that you will see more of in the future. ​

“Working Towards Environmental Justice in the Commonwealth: What Can Your Congregation Do?"  This panel discussion was facilitated by our own Green Faith Fellow, “Doc ” Robin van Tine.  He introduced Gustavo Angeles of the Sierra Club (www.sierraclub.org/virginia) and Kendyl Crawford of Virginia Interfaith Power and Light (https://vaipl.org).  They both are a valuable resource for local inequality issues.  They depend upon a local issue to come to their attention, and they will come to do training and support to empower those affected by the injustice.  Participants were requested to inform them of where such local needs exist. ​

​That led to the Closing Ceremony.  The seven Cluster minister processed to the front to a standing ovation.  They then closed out the meeting and extinguished the Chalice repeating the "LET’S GO" theme. Attendees then joined in song.  Congregations then gathered separately for pictures.  I am a big believer in Saturday gatherings of UUs like this Cluster.  The spring of 1987, as new UUs, we attended a Thomas Jefferson District meeting in Charlotte, NC.  We wanted to learn more about what Unitarian Universalism was all about; how far and wide had those ideas spread.  That led to many adventures and friendships and much inspiration.  I always want to support the gathering of UUs. The Tidewater Cluster will meet at Coastal Virginia UU, Virginia Beach, next October 2020.  This event is going strong.  So, LET’S GO!

I think the garden itself inspired generosity each time it produced more than we could use ourselves.  Produce was given to neighbors walking by and to many different people outside of our fellowship who attended meetings here.  Veggies were given to the Boys and Girls Club as well.  It also inspired our members to be generous with supplies and time.  We had many donations of both.

theme: Belonging

This year, we are taking our monthly themes from “Soul Matters”, a network of Unitarian Universalist congregations who follow the same themes for the purpose of sharing worship, music, religious education and small group resources.

Unless otherwise noted, services include sermons preached by the Rev. Andrew Clive Millard and take place at 9:30am and 11:15am on Sundays.

October 6th: “Water of Life”

Our bodies are mostly water.  Each one of us once floated, unborn, in the sea of our mother’s womb, our lungs filled with fluid.  Before and after we were born, water has moved in and out of each our cells, at every moment of every day of our lives.  Water is essential to our living, and to our spirituality: the water we drink unites us with the Earth as intimately as the air we breathe.  

We’ll celebrate the Water Communion!  Please bring a small amount of water from your home — from your kitchen sink is perfect.  During the service, we’ll pour the water into a common bowl, representing what each of us brings to the shared life of our congregation.

October 13th: “Intentionally Inclusive”

Every second Sunday, the lay leader mentions that we are a Welcoming Congregation, “intentionally inclusive of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer people.”  When it comes to who belongs to our Fellowship, what does it mean to be “intentionally inclusive”?  Do we only need to leave the door open?  Or is there more to it than that?

October 20th: “Unity”

Following a brief description of biographical information and marginalized identity, Unity will share a four-part autobiographical story about the daily lived experience of a non-binary person as well as the spirituality involved with such an identity.

Unity Walker is a PhD student at the College of William and Mary studying Counselor Education and Supervision.  Unity uses they/them pronouns.  Their research focuses on spirituality and marginalized identity.  They have recently moved to Newport News from Auburn AL where they worked as a counselor at a local psychiatric facility and were the LGBT advocacy coordinator at Auburn University.

October 27th: “Would We Be One?”

Much of what goes on in society seems to be the result of a tension between the individual and the group, between independence and conformity, between separateness and belonging.  Within Unitarian Universalim, community is offered as the antidote to the myth of rugged individualism, and yet, when it comes to being one, there are subtle traps for the unwary.

Special music will be provided by the fabulous ChorUUs!

a poem by Mary-Elizabeth Cotton

Rev. Andrew writes:

Not long after I arrived at the Fellowship, a little over nine years ago, I was talking to Bob Smith about our Fellowship Circles program and he told me that our Nursery Attendant, Mary-Elizabeth Cotton, had written a wonderful poem that got to the true heart of what Fellowship Circles are all about.  I asked Mary if she’d send me a copy of it, which she did, and I saw for myself that Bob was spot on.  I have since used that poem as a reading in services and as a text for meditation and sharing.  It has also been shared by the UU Small Group Ministry Network, helping Unitarian Universalists everywhere to embrace listening as a spiritual practice.

Let us listen…

     Just for a while
     Let us silence our minds
     And open our hearts.

          Just for a while
          Let us listen from within.

Listen…

     Not to gain knowledge,
     Not to formulate questions,

          Rather to chance upon
          Sacred bonds and
          Profound wisdom.

               Just for a while
               Let us not seek information
               Or answers.

                    Let us not rouse the intellect
                    But embrace the spirit.

                         If thoughts cloud the brain
                         May we let them pass.

                              If replies tingle on the tongue.
                              Let us breathe them away silently.

                                   Return to them later
                                   But here…

                                        Here in this precious time of sharing

Let us listen…

     Let the words wash over us
     ​And seep into a still, quiet pool.

Let us listen.

Really, I had already known for at least a year or so that the Unitarian Universalists were “my people” — mostly “old” people (it was Southwest Florida, after all).  But the first UU sermon that I ever heard was preached by the Rev. Josiah Reed Bartlett — past president of the Starr King UU seminary, and essentially the founder of the UUA’s interim minister program.  He preached with a humility, humor, and grace that revealed to me a truth about how a person might choose to be in this world.  To paraphrase Maya Angelou, I barely remember what he said, but I’ll never forget how he made me feel.  I wanted to choose to be like him.

But the rest of the story is that I went off to boot camp, graduated, and was moved around to various naval communities in the USA, visiting UU churches whenever I could.  I spent the most time, almost a year, at First Unitarian Universalist in Orlando, Florida, listening to another UU celebrity minister, the Rev. Marni Harmony.  And then I moved overseas, and was a Unitarian Universalist only through our “correspondence church,” the Church of the Larger Fellowship.  I was “in community” only via an email list-serve group (something rarely done these days).  The result is that I mostly learned how a UU community works via the written word.  I’d like to say I spent the entire fifteen years overseas in that community — but I eventually stopped reading the emails as my career and relationship concerns took over.

Then five years ago, a family crisis brought me to Virginia, where I joined UUFP.  Slowly, with the gentle encouragement of some long time members, I began to become more involved.  I facilitated a Sunday Morning Forum, and I began working with the youth.  And I began seeing what in-person UU “congregational life” was all about — with all the little dramas, triumphs, and tragedies.  Eventually, somebody thought it would be a good idea to send me to UU leadership school, known as SUULE (Southern Region Unitarian Universalist Leadership Experience).  I went in 2017 — a full twenty years after I first signed the book in Florida.  It changed everything.

They call it a “Leadership Experience” because if you let it, it has the power to transform the way you see the world.  This is what I let happen to me.  My partner from UUFP in this experience was our beloved and recently passed Sarah Pierce-Davis.  She and I, in moments of quiet conversation, had what I can only describe as “moments of clarity,” where we suddenly understood some of the social and psychological processes that underlie the community of UUFP.  We could identify the “pockets of health” and some of the areas of anxiety at work.  We were introduced to what they call the “balcony view” of our Fellowship, rather than the more familiar “dance floor” view.  After twenty years of being a Unitarian Universalist, I suddenly felt as though I had “levelled up” in the game — perhaps akin to the sort of religious initiation experience that Joseph Campbell often wrote about:  In a sense, I could now see the “faces” that were previously hidden behind masks.  I’m not a better UU now.  But I am a very different UU.

Starting this spring, the UUA’s Southern Region is offering a version of the Leadership Experience for our Tidewater Cluster of congregations:  The Tidewater Cluster Extended Leadership Experience (TExLE).  I would encourage every UUFP member that is able to attend to sign up.  It will require four Saturdays of your time:  The first Saturdays of March, April, May, and June.  The cost is $120 for the whole series — but if you find that is out of your budget, let me (or the Rev. Andrew, or Henry Chambers) know and we will try to find an accommodation for you.  We will also likely car-pool to the sites:

Session One: March 7, 2020, Williamsburg
Session Two: April 4, 2020, Glen Allen
Session Three: May 2, 2020, Richmond
Session Four: June 6, 2020, Newport News, here at UUFP

I would urge you to consider it not as a “leadership/motivational seminar”, but rather as a path in your Unitarian Universalist faith development.  The more people among us who can identify the patterns that move us, the more powerful we will be as a community and as individuals.  Register at this link, and then let us know that you did:  https://www.eventbrite.com/e/extended-leadership-experience-tidewater-cluster-registration-53689713378

The NAACP, Hampton Branch, and the United Way hosted a meeting with community leaders to kick-off awareness of the upcoming decennial census.  Politicians led with the importance of getting people counted, as federal funding is based on census data.  As well, apportionment of State Legislatures and the House of Representatives are census dependent.  Traci DeShazor, Virginia’s Deputy Secretary of State, explained the existence and workings of the Virginia Complete Count Commission, who will be in the forefront of alerting and educating citizens.  Ron Brown of the U. S. Census Bureau also echoed concerns brought up and took questions.  There will be the ability to submit census information online for those able to do that.  The census form will be in English and Spanish.  Online and telephone callers will have access to 13 languages.  Glossaries and other information will expand the languages to 59.
 
A group of speakers offered tips on dealing with distinct populations:  Seniors, Hispanics/Latinx, those experiencing homelessness, Asians, and low-income residents.  The census count depends on overcoming:  fear of government, fear of loss of children or housing, privacy concerns, illiteracy by a respondent, and difficulty understanding English, which led to a major point of the gathering—those being counted hearing from people they trust about the importance an accurate count will have on them.  One source being “counted” on will be school children bringing news of the census home to their parents/guardians.
 
The specifics show the importance.  Children, five years old and younger are the most undercounted.  Two million children were not counted in the 2010 census.  Census data is used to advocate for children and others.  Each uncounted person represents the loss of $2,000.00 in Federal revenue.  In the State’s 95th District, Marcia Price’s in Newport News, 23% of residents have been designated “hard-to-count.” 
 
The public information campaign, local, state, and national will start this fall.  Census Day is April 1, 2020.

theme: Expectation

This year, we are taking our monthly themes from “Soul Matters”, a network of Unitarian Universalist congregations who follow the same themes for the purpose of sharing worship, music, religious education and small group resources.

Unless otherwise noted, services include sermons preached by the Rev. Andrew Clive Millard and take place at 9:30am and 11:15am on Sundays.

September 1st: “Living for Each Other”

For all of the cook-outs, car sales and consumerism, Labor Day was intended as a celebration of workers and their contributions to the prosperity, sustainability and well-being of our society.  This year, Labor Day brings into focus the relationship between the two “pillar” Principles: the inherent worth and dignity of every person, and the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part.

Services will include a Blessing of the Backpacks for the new school year!

September 8th: “What Do We Expect of One Another?”

Unitarian Universalism is a covenantal faith in that we define ourselves as part of a UU community not by claiming that we hold to a certain set of beliefs, a creed, but rather by actively engaging in a process of making promises about how we intend to treat one another, a covenant.  When it comes to what is expected of us and what we expect of one another, it’s best not to assume!

We’ll offer our Blessing to our Religious Educators for the new season of RE classes!

September 15th: “A Mending Grace”

If you tell a group of Unitarian Universalists that the “Grace of God” will “heal” them, in the best case scenario you’ll be asked to clarify your terms.  Even our UU theists tend not to expect God’s grace to work without any human help.  Is “healing” even a useful paradigm?  If not, what should we expect from our faith and from each other when we feel the need to restore our souls?

Scott Kasmire officially joined Unitarian Universalism on Groundhog Day of 1997 for the purpose of having a religious preference embossed on his Navy dog tags.  He has since been a member of UU churches in Florida, the Church of the Larger Fellowship and the UUFP.  He currently serves the UUFP’s Mission as a member of the Committee on Ministry.

September 22nd: “Warts and All”

According to the ancient Greek writer Pausanias, the Temple of Apollo at Delphi offered the advice “know thyself” to seekers of wisdom.  In his Poor Richard’s Almanack, Benjamin Franklin wrote, “There are three Things extremely hard, Steel, a Diamond, and to know one's self.”  And yet, we cannot really understand other people and the world we share unless we understand who we are.

September 29th: “Fruits of the Spirit”

This year, our Wednesday evenings have included workshops from the Tapestry of Faith program “Spirit of Life”, focusing on various aspects of spirituality as framed by the lyrics of the Carolyn McDade that we sing every Sunday.  Now that these workshops have concluded, let’s reflect on the gifts of our shared journey, including what we have learned about ourselves and one another.

Special music will be provided by the fabulous ChorUUs!

This reflection was offered at services on July 21st
by Lehni Lebert.

There is an awesome power in listening.  There is power in speaking.  I learned that when I worked with
young people who had run away from home.  We practiced active listening skills.  I saw listening and
speaking change lives.  Over the years I had lost some of my listening skills.  I wanted to be a better listener.

When I first heard about Fellowship Circles, I thought, this is it!  But when it came time to sign up, I felt frightened.  I signed up in spite of my fear.  I have participated in two Fellowship circle cycles.  My first circle was beautifully co-facilitated by Kathryn and Scott.  They created a safe and trusting space.  Members suggested topics, and many times facilitated the sessions.  This past cycle I co-facilitated a circle.  I had fabulous mentors in Alice, my co-facilitator, and Rev. Andrew, who offers the circle for the Facilitators.

We focus on a kind of listening that was new for me: Deep Compassionate Listening.  It asks me to give total focus on the speaker.  Listening for what they want to share and how they want to share it.  I am asked to accept, not agree or disagree, not to question, to trust them to find their own words.  I need an attitude of mind and body attuned to the speaker.  Simple, but not easy.  Refraining from rehearsing what I will say.  Keeping my mind from wandering, especially as things they say trigger memories.  I find it challenging and soul nourishing.

I find deep listening to be a gift to the listener and the speaker.  I feel freer to listen because I don’t have to worry about a right response, or about fixing anything.  I can respect the speaker’s ability to speak for themselves and find their own expressions.  I learn from them.  I am encouraged to share my self more honestly.  I know there is no judgment in the circle.  I can trust, I can share more deeply.  It is a gift to be heard.

I like the use of silences after each speaker.  I can relax my mind and reflect on what’s been said.  I can now think about what I might want to say about the topic.  I find the silences are like the rests between the notes that make the music.  We create the circle of caring.

My circles let me meet and get to know people I might not have crossed paths with in daily or Fellowship life.  We have laughed, cried, shared memories, hopes, dreams, opinions and our faith.  The foundation of deep compassionate listening lets us know each other more personally, more deeply than conversations or shared activities could have.  For me, Fellowship Circles are a special time, out of the ordinary time.  A sacred time.

At first I was daunted by the commitments.  Eighteen months, two sessions per month seems long at the beginning, but months flew by!  Being there for the others and sharing myself with them.  Learning to listen deeply is a hard skill to master, but worth the effort.  No matter how busy or tired I was, I have always been glad I had chosen to go to circle.  There are not many things I do in my life that I am always glad, always better for having gone.  I think the Circles bring us closer together as a congregation.  They
do help me Connect in Love.

We are now accepting registrations for the new cycle of Fellowship Circles.  You can register by printing out and completing this form or by visiting Gayle's table outside the Sanctuary on a Sunday morning.  For more information, you can also send an e-mail to fellowshipcircles@uufp.org.

Summer is swiftly coming to a close so I wanted to thank those who helped with the summer RE program.  ​

Homily from July 21st
by Rev. Andrew Clive Millard

Let me tell you a story.

Once upon a time, a child went to play at a neighbor’s house.  When the time came and went for her to return home, her parents began to wonder where she was.  They called the neighbor, who confirmed that the child had left already.  Just as her parents were about to go looking for her, she opened the front door.  Relieved, but concerned, they asked their daughter where she had been, why it had taken her so long to get home from the neighbor’s house.  The child explained that she had stopped to help another child who lived in the neighborhood, whose brand new bike had just broken.

“Help him?” said her parents.  “What do you mean?  Did you know how to fix his bike?”

“No,” answered the child.

“Then how did you help him?” they asked.

“Well,” she said, “he was so upset when his bike broke, that I stopped to help him cry.”

Sometimes what makes the biggest difference to someone with a problem is not, in fact, fixing their problem for them, but rather simply being with them as they face it, reminding them that they are not alone.

 Let me tell you another story.

Many years ago, I attended my first ministers’ retreat.  At such retreats, Unitarian Universalist ministers from all over the region gather for three or four days, to participate in some program of continuing education, to be sure, but really the primary purpose is to spend time with one another.
I remember this retreat because being there helped me to get through a very hard time.

It was a pretty large group of ministers, so at first all we could do to check in was go around the circle, give our names, and say where we were from.  A little later on, then, we broke into smaller groups and dispersed to different parts of where we were meeting for a deeper check-in.  And yes, we went deep.

I’m sure that some of my colleagues knew each other already.  I hadn’t met any of the others in my small group before then, though I knew a couple of them by name.  But as we took turns to share more deeply about what was going on in our lives — the joys and the sorrows, at work and at home — I immediately felt a sense of trust.  The fact that we were all willing to listen to one another — without interrupting or fixing or giving advice or correcting one another, just listening, as deeply and as compassionately as possible — made it possible to be vulnerable in a way that I had never experienced before.  And it made a huge difference to me.

I continue to rely on my colleagues, to have places where I can bare my soul about what’s going on for me, because I’ve realized it’s essential for me to have such places.  Yes, sometimes I want advice, but mostly I just want to be heard, to be reminded that, even though nobody else can fix my problems for me, I am not alone in facing them.

Let me tell you one more story.

Once upon a time, there was a congregation that had time at the end of the service for people to provide direct feedback on the sermon.  This time was called “talk back”, but it might have been better named “give the speaker a piece of your mind”.  A few people in the congregation would do just that, criticizing whatever had just been said and then leaving, rather than waiting to hear what anyone else had to say.  Perhaps it was good that they left, though, because when it came to the annual meeting, discussions would descend into bitter arguments.  There was even name-calling.

Then the congregation decided to try something new.  They began a program where, twice each month, members gathered in small groups to listen to one another.  Anyone in the group could say pretty much whatever they wanted to say, and everyone else would simply listen.  No interrupting, no fixing, no giving advice, no correcting one another.  Just listening, as deeply and as compassionately as possible.  Not every member of the congregation was in such a group, but over time most of them had participated in the program, and the congregation’s culture began to change.

When it came to someone speaking of personal matters, people were better at actually listening, rather than not really hearing the other person because they were too busy thinking of what they were going to say next.

When it came to someone expressing an opinion, people were better at truly hearing what that person had to say, not necessarily agreeing with them, but respecting that person’s ownership of their own position.

And when it came time for someone to finish speaking, people were better at allowing for silence before immediately rushing to fill the space with their own words.

Some of you know that, yes, the congregation in this story was this Fellowship.  And the program that was a big part of changing the congregation’s culture is our Fellowship Circles program, where small groups of people get together to practice listening to one another.  Something as simple as listening makes a big difference.

So this morning we’re going to hear from three participants in our Fellowship Circles — Lehni Lebert, Randy Phillips and Pam Luke — who will share with us the difference this has made to them personally.  We’ll hear what they get out of being in a Fellowship Circle, how has it challenged them, and what it means to them that the congregation offers this program.

A new round of Fellowship Circles starts at the end of September, and Gayle Phillips, to whom I am very grateful for coordinating this program for the last few years, will be pleased to talk to you after the service about registering for a circle.  I encourage you to give serious thought to joining a Fellowship Circle.  There are so few places in our lives where we can go to be heard, where others are truly listening to you, deeply and compassionately, without interrupting you or fixing you or giving you advice or correcting you.  It seems like such a simple thing, but it makes a big difference, both to us as individuals as well as to our community.

If the purpose of the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of the Peninsula is to practice community as deeply and as thoroughly as we can, then Fellowship Circles and other spiritual development groups are a key part of that practice.  I like to imagine what a difference it would make to our wider society, how it would inform our sense of community, if enough people could learn to listen to one another.  If I had the ability to enroll all of the politicians in Washington in a UU program, well, okay, the first I’d have them all do is Our Whole Lives, our age-appropriate sexuality education program, but the second I’d have them do would be Fellowship Circles.  Being heard, being able to hear one another is that transformative.  I invite you to be a part of that.

We are now accepting registrations for the new cycle of Fellowship Circles.  You can register by printing out and completing this form or by visiting Gayle's table outside the Sanctuary on a Sunday morning.  For more information, you can also send an e-mail to fellowshipcircles@uufp.org.

August 4th: "Prison Religion: Holistic Life in an Unequal World"

Through respect for the interdependent web of all existence, we acknowledge connections between all things, including "religion" and "prisons".  The rise of "religion" (understood as separate from "politics" or "secular") coincided with the rise of modern prison systems.  Whatever we believe about "religion" not only connects to our beliefs about prison but may also imprison us and separate us from holistic life.  Together we take gradual steps to unravel the ties that blind us.

Anthony T. Fiscella, currently a member of the Church of the Larger Fellowship, has worked with social justice issues, underground music and formal research.  He now finds himself in the process of transitioning back to Virginia from Sweden and back to activism from academia.  This process has begun with the founding of EarthBond U, an organization dedicated to holistic sustainability and grassroots education.

August 11th: "No, You Can't Believe Whatever You Want"

Religion is not merely about belief — it's more about behavior and belonging — but belief matters to the extent that it determines how we behave and to whom we belong, whether we recognize that or not.  Unitarian Universalism upholds freedom of belief, not as passive "tolerance" but by actively helping us to understand and express what we already believe.

August 18th: "Life's Too Short to Sing the Melody"

We have a strong musical tradition, and ours is a singing congregation, too!  Let’s consider some of the more familiar hymns in our repertoire and learn to sing their harmonies, so that we’ll be able to enrich our time together as a congregation the next time we sing them!

We’ll be accompanied by members of the UUFP Winds!

August 25th: "Erring on the Side of Love"

Nobody’s perfect, and we all make mistakes.  Recognizing that, we both accept the imperfections of others by assuming their good intentions and hold ourselves accountable for the outcomes of our own actions.  The good news is, we know there will always be room to improve ourselves!

I realized, then, a possible essential difference between our faith and many others.  It is that, while some people may go to church for the purpose of finding God there, we go to learn how to make God find us where we live.

​theme: Journey

Unless otherwise noted, services include sermons preached by Rev. Andrew Clive Millard and take place at 9:30am and 11:15am on Sundays.

July 7th: “One Small Step”
July 14th: “One Giant Leap”

NASA’s Apollo 11 mission was launched from Kennedy Space Center on July 16th 1969 and, while Michael Collins stayed in lunar orbit, Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin landed on the Moon on July 20th.  Armstrong became the first human to step foot on the Moon on July 21st, and all three astronauts returned safely to Earth on July 24th.  As we celebrate this month's momentous anniversary, let’s consider the small steps and the giant leaps that we can take in our own time.

July 21st: “Hearing One Another”

Fellowship Circles are small, supportive groups that offer an environment for spiritual and personal growth.  In these circles, we: practice listening to each other; learn to think deeply about our lives and beliefs; help each other by sharing difficult or joyous issues; strive to enhance our spiritual maturity; and nourish our inner-selves with the kind of personal sharing that seldom occurs in everyday life.

A number of participants from the 2017–19 round of Fellowship Circles will share their experience and the importance of this program in their lives.  New circles start this Fall!

July 28th: “Life’s Hardest Questions: Answered!”

In early cultures, elders would have been consulted on all difficult questions.  Modern society, with its emphasis on technology and popular culture, has diminished their role.  A Google search, however, can lead to more confusion than truth — almost any search will bear this out!  A traditional approach may bear more fruit.

Our Fellowship is fortunate to have many elders who are, to put it succinctly, wise.  Let’s gather together and ask some of our most experienced members our difficult questions.  Bob Smith, Pat Yaros, Richard Hudgins and Pat Sloane have graciously volunteered to tackle whatever you bring to the service.  Steve Farthing will facilitate.

​Good Morning,

My family has been a part of this church for about as long as I can remember.  As of lately, I’ve had less and less time to attend services, classes, and youth group, but it wasn’t until I was going through a bunch of old photos of when I was a counselor for summer camp, or hanging around a campfire at an old retreat, when I was reminded of how much of an impact this community has had on me.

I think everyone can agree that middle school was an awkward time, or I can at least prove it was awkward for me once you see my fashion decisions in my slideshow coming up, but a lot of the time it wasn’t easy to make close friends because 12-year-olds will be 12-year-olds.  So having such close friends in my classes in church gave me so much more confidence and trust in myself because I never had a doubt in my mind that they would humiliate me, unlike the social battleground we call public school.  Arik, Athena, and I, otherwise known as the A-Team, were undefeatable, and to this day I still miss when we would take the class to Starbucks and discuss things like why do bad things happen to good people.

This church has also broadened my understanding of how I see the world around me.  When I was young, all I wanted to do was listen to music and play video games.  Honestly, not much has changed.  But when I got to class with my friends, we were asked some pretty challenging questions that I hadn’t even come close to thinking about at that time, which really was the first time I started developing my own opinions and learning how to have meaningful discussion.
 
And with that I really want to thank all of the teachers I’ve had throughout my many classes, to name a few—Jeff, Ms. Kraft, my dad, Brownie lady, and Scott.  I also, of course, would like to thank Ms. Joanne for all she’s done for me and really every teenager at this church.  I’m still sorry for when I knocked over the chalice with a dodgeball; the sand poured onto the piano, and it took forever to clean up.  I hope we can leave that in the past.

As for future plans, right now I have decided to use the money I have been saving for about three years to purchase a van and move to Alaska.  I’m gonna live off of the land and the money I have, and last as long as I can.  Just kidding; I’m going to American University in DC to study audio technology, and after I get my diploma, I’m getting the van and moving to Alaska.  Sorry mixed those up.  And that’s about all I have.   Thank you for listening.

"For all that is our life" by Rev. Andrew

​Last year we celebrated the Fellowship’s sixtieth anniversary.  It was our diamond jubilee, sixty years since the congregation’s charter was issued by the American Unitarian Association in 1958.  We talked about the history of the Fellowship, how it was formed with the help of what was then the Unitarian Church of Norfolk and in close association with what was then the Hampton Institute.  The congregation was active in denominational matters and social justice issues right from the start.  In a state that was involved in “massive resistance” to school desegregation, it was, in fact, a racially integrated religious community.

One of the defining events in our history took place forty years ago, in May 1979, when the congregation’s building on Briarfield Road burned down.  Almost everything that the Fellowship owned was destroyed, and it was only thanks to a couple of bookcases falling over that a few important items were saved from the fire: one, the 1958 charter itself; two, the membership book; and three, the chalice we light every Sunday, given by teenager Keith Dixon when his family moved away.

Thanks to the recently increased insurance policy, there was money to build anew, and within a year the Fellowship had bought a lot on Young’s Mill Lane and broken ground for a new building, our Sanctuary building.  Of course, a congregation is not the same as its building: a congregation is made of people, and it only occupies a building in order for those people to have space to worship and learn and plan and enjoy potlucks together.  But the fire was a major test of the endurance, resilience and courage of the people in this congregation, who gathered what they could from the ashes and rose again.  The charter and the membership book and the chalice were important parts of that, each of them a reminder that buildings come and buildings go, but the congregation endures.

In April, we participated in the dedication of the new building of the Coastal Virginia Unitarian Universalists, what used to be the Unitarian Church of Norfolk before they moved to Virginia Beach.  They didn’t have anything like a fire to make them move out of their old building, but they did have regular flooding of their property that is only getting worse as sea levels rise.  Still, it took a long time and it was very difficult for them to make the decision to move, to sell their old building, to buy a new one, to renovate it.  They were talking about moving when I got here almost ten years ago, and they moved less than a year ago.  In between, they’ve had conflict, they’ve had loss, and they’ve had a number of ministers, including one, the Rev. Jennifer Slade, who died while she was with them.  They’ve had a hard journey, but they endured.  And now they’re thriving.  And growing: their RE program has gone from nine children to ninety children in less than a year.

As with most building dedications, it was a grand affair, with clergy and leaders from other congregations in attendance and, in this case, a combined choir, including members of our own ChorUUs.  The Rev. Jeanne Pupke, from First UU in Richmond, preached the sermon, and her text, which our former intern Walter Clark read, was the following by the late Rev. Peter Raible, who had been minister in Seattle.

     We build on foundations we did not lay.
     We warm ourselves by fires we did not light.
     We sit in the shade of trees we did not plant.
     We drink from wells we did not dig.
     We profit from persons we did not know.
     This is as it should be.

     Together we are more than any one person could be.
     Together we can build across the generations.
     Together we can renew our hope and faith in the life that is yet to unfold.
     Together we can heed the call to a ministry of care and justice.
     We are ever bound in community.
     May it always be so.

Jeanne’s message to the Coastal Virginia Unitarian Universalists was simple but powerful: celebrate this new building, yes, but then let go of it; remember that the building serves the congregation’s mission, not for the sake of the people who struggled so hard to obtain it, but for the sake of the people who are yet to come.

There is not only an abstract principle here — that just as we benefit from the people who came before us, so do we need to “pay it forward” to the people who will come after us — but the very practical matter that congregations that have been through some hardship can very easily fragment into the people who actually went through that hardship together and the people who didn’t.  Imagine if those of us who were here four years ago when the pipe in our kitchen burst and flooded the building, imagine if we took that not only as part of our history as a congregation, but as part of our identity as members: for those of us who were here when the building flooded, that would be part of who we are, and that means that anybody who came here after that wouldn’t be part of who we are, and never could be.

So for a congregation that has been through as much as the Coastal Virginia UUs have over the last decade, Jeanne’s message was spot-on, and I hope they’re taking it to heart.  But it got me thinking about our own future, here at the Fellowship, and the fact that we need to make a decision about our own buildings, whether to expand here or move to a bigger facility somewhere else.

We’ve been putting off that decision for longer than I’ve been here, but it’s increasingly clear that we’re constrained by our space.  There’s no doubt that we’d grow if we had the room.  (Not only are the Coastal Virginia UUs growing thanks to their move to a bigger building, by the way, but the Williamsburg UUs are growing thanks to expanding their building, so we have examples of both options.)  And the fact that we’ve been putting off that decision has hurt us in other ways.

Whenever someone suggests putting solar panels on the roof, to lower our environmental footprint and save us some money on our electricity bill, the conversation inevitably gets around to the fact that we don’t know if we’ll be in this building before the solar panels have paid for themselves or not.  When it comes to engaging with our neighborhood and our local community on social justice and other issues that matter to them, recognizing that it takes time to get to know people and to build relationships and to earn our neighbor’s trust, we have to admit that we can’t commit to doing that because we don’t know if we’ll be here for long enough.

So, recognizing that we need space to grow, that we’ve tried all of the technical tweaks of timing and building use that we can, we started doing our homework, to find out what it would take to make a decision. And in talking with various Unitarian Universalist Association staff and other experts, we were met with a simple question: Why?

Why do we want more space?  What is our purpose such that we need more space?

The answer, by the way, is not “to grow”.  Growth is an outcome, not a purpose.

This was something we talked about quite a bit last week, at the second retreat of my GreenFaith Fellowship this year.  We talked about POP, which stands for purpose, outcome and process.

Purpose is why you’re doing something.  Outcome is what you’re doing.  Process is how you’re doing it.  It’s very easy, when planning anything, to identify the outcome and the process, the what and the how, but most of the time the purpose is, at best, implicit, and yet everything else depends upon it.  It’s the purpose that gets other people on board.  It’s the purpose that inspires them to get involved and offer their support, that encourages them when times are hard, that helps them to see a better future.

So when someone asks why you want to do something and you can’t answer that question except in terms of what you want to do and how you want to do it, that’s a problem.

Two years ago, then, we started to work on answering that question.  More than a quarter of the congregation participated in a workshop to identify our essential core values, the qualities that lie at the heart of our identity as the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of the Peninsula and shape everything that we do, whether we realize it or not.  And those values, as we named them, are wonder, love, service and generosity.

Next we tried to articulate what we do with those values, matching them up with some verbs and trying them on to see if they fit what we’re already doing as a congregation.  We spent a year doing that and then, last June, we agreed that the mission of the UUFP is indeed to grow in wonder, connect in love, engage in service and inspire generosity.

Since then, we’ve started working on the next stage, which is to ask what it will take to get us from the congregation we are now to become a congregation that lives that mission fully and completely.  In other words, we’ve been thinking about our vision of ourselves as the congregation that our mission is asking us to become.  Over the next year, the next three years, the next five years, what more can we do to help one another grow in wonder?  How can we be better at connecting in love, with one another and with our neighbors?  What else can we do to help more members and friends to engage in service?  How can we be a better example to those beyond our walls and inspire generosity in the world?

This is not, I would note, vision in any ultimate sense, like the kingdom of heaven or the Beloved Community.  Rather it’s a short-term vision, helping us to see what we need to do next to get from where we are now to where we need to be.  And it’s this vision that will help us answer questions of purpose.  After all, if our purpose is to offer community services to the hungry and the homeless, then we need a large kitchen, places where people can sleep and a location near to those people.  If our purpose is to organize social justice events and work with decision-makers, when we need offices where people can meet and plan.  If our purpose is to offer learning opportunities and promote spiritual development, then we need classrooms and workshop spaces.  If our purpose is to promote music and develop new worship arts, then we need performance spaces and practice rooms.  And so on.

Oh, and you’re not allowed to say “All of the above.”  Sorry!  When a congregation can’t name the primary purpose for which it needs facilities, it’s very easy to end up with space that doesn’t suit any purpose very well.

First UU in Richmond recently completed a massive renovation of its building, making it a lot more usable to the congregation, because it turns out it had never been designed as a church but as an art gallery.  Yes, they’re a church all year ‘round, but in the Fall they host a huge art show that is also a major fundraiser for the congregation, and it was the purpose of the gallery, rather than any particular purpose as a church, that determined the design of the building.  And it took them decades to fix that.

So this Summer, you can be part of articulating our vision of ourselves over the next few years.  Committees and ministries and the Board have all been thinking about their own goals, but on July 13th we’re going to put it all together and put into words what we want to do next to get from where we are now to where we need to be.  On Saturday July 13th, the Planning Committee and I will offer a workshop, for as many of you as can attend, to distill down our understanding of ourselves and the work that we are called to do, and on that understanding we’ll build our strategic plan.  Since that will also let us answer the question of purpose, this plan will include finally making our long-delayed decision about whether we expand our facilities where we are now or move to a bigger location.  So please save the date of Saturday July 13th so that you can be a part of this crucial next step.

Knowing our history is important, because it helps us understand where we came from and how we came to be who we are.  But the paradox is that even as we embrace our past, we must also let go of it.  We need to remember it, even honor it, but we cannot be bound by it.  For what we do today, the church we build, is not for us, but for the people who are not even here yet.  We commit our strength, we offer our devotion, we give of ourselves, not for what any one of us will get out of doing this, but for how we will change the world by doing it.  As Peter Raible put it,

     Together we are more than any one person could be.
     Together we can build across the generations.
     Together we can renew our hope and faith in the life that is yet to unfold.
     Together we can heed the call to a ministry of care and justice.
     We are ever bound in community.
     May it always be so.

theme: Evangelizing

Unless otherwise noted, services include sermons preached by Rev. Andrew Clive Millard and take place at 9:30am and 11:15am on Sundays.

June 2nd: “You Are Beautiful”

Unitarian ministers Norbert and Maja Čapek created the Flower Communion in 1920s Prague as a spiritual celebration of the beauty of each person.  As World War II began, they defied fascism and continued to preach the inherent worth and dignity of all people.  In our time, when some people profit from sowing division, our affirmation of beauty is central to our good news.

For our Flower Communion, please bring a flower (preferably with a long stem) with you.  Flowers are collected in vases and then distributed during the service.  We’ll also celebrate the Bridging of one of our Youth.

June 9th: “You Can Choose Your Own Name”

We Unitarian Universalists have come to be known as the people of the words.  How many of us have spent hours in passionate discussion seeking the perfect way to word a resolution or mission statement or bylaw amendment?  Yes, we love our words.  But words also have the power to harm, to disenfranchise.  Can we move from a love of language to a language of love?

Rev. Justine Sullivan hails from Northborough MA where she was ordained into Unitarian Universalist ministry in 2017.  Prior to that she served as a congregational consultant and facilitator throughout New England and served as district president and president of the district presidents’ association.  Justine is currently serving as interim minister of the Coastal Virginia Unitarian Universalists (CVUU) in Virginia Beach.  Justine and her spouse Dale and their dog Callie divide their time between Virginia and Massachusetts.  We welcome her to the Fellowship in her first pulpit swap with Rev. Andrew!

June 16th: “You Are Not Alone”

One of the central truths of Unitarian Universalism is that we’re all in this together.  Whatever our trials and challenges, in fair weather and in foul, the good news is that we do not need to face the world by ourselves.  And when it comes to making the world a better place, by easing suffering and dismantling oppression, we know we can make a difference by working together.

We’ll also recognize the ministry of our Religious Educators.

June 23rd: “You Are the Melody”

Ever wanted to find out what it’s really like to be a singer or musician?  Please join us for personal reflections from some of our accomplished vocalists and instrumentalists.  We will explore and celebrate the role of music in our lives and recognize everyone who has contributed to our musical offerings this past year.

This service is offered by the Sunday Services Committee.  Special music will be provided by the UUFP’s ChorUUs!  We’ll also recognize the ministry of our Musicians.

June 30th: “You Have the Power”

Power is the ability to make change, and agency is the choice we have to use our power to oppose what’s bad and make good happen instead.  Our culture teaches us to be afraid of power and to ignore our own agency because that supports the status quo and serves the interests of those who benefit from it.  Let’s remind ourselves of our own power and reclaim our agency!

"For all that is our life" by Rev. Andrew

(Read Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3.)

​We began our last day at Stony Point with a further discussion about GreenFaith itself, which is currently reorganizing on a global scale in order to more effectively address the climate crisis.  Specifically, since we're completing our first year as Fellows, we talked about how GreenFaith can continue to support us and re-engage with previous classes of Fellows and activate environmentalists across the United States and around the world.  With eleven years for us to make the systemic changes needed to get climate change under control and avoid catastrophe, there is a sense of urgency that needs to translate into widespread and forceful action.

Before heading our separate ways, we finished with an activity that I have heard of some Unitarian Universalist congregations doing.  The Climate Ribbon is an art-based ritual, launched at the conclusion of the 2014 People's Climate March in New York, "to grieve what each of us stands to lose to climate chaos and affirm our solidarity as we unite to fight against it."  GreenFaith's organizers had brought a piece of the Climate Ribbon installation from the 2015 UN Climate Summit in Paris, and we were invited to add to it.  Each of us wrote on a length of ribbon the name of a place or a people at risk, as well as our own name, and then exchanged it with another ribbon so that we'd carry someone else's hope with us.  I wrote "Newport News VA" on my ribbon, both for the health impacts of the coal held in the Southeast Community and for the effects of sea-level rise resulting from global warming thanks to the burning of that coal in Asia.